Sunday, August 19, 2012

It's not shake 'n bake, but he did help

Scene: Tonight. My house. Post evening play in the neighborhood.
(This is, apparently, my time to think I'm always in a play or whatever. I don't know- just go with it)

Me: Kid, where is your brother?

9: [shrug] He's your kid. You're supposed to know where he is.

Me: [eyes starting to boil] Whoa. Did you just give me ATTITUDE young lady?

9: [sweet smile] I don't give you attitude. I AM AN ATTITUDE!

Me: [whispering to self] I am raising myself. [to 9} Go find him please.

My daughter was just playing around, BTW. We have a weird relationship. Don't judge.
Some time later:

Me: [from top of stairs] KID! DID YOU FIND HIM YET?

9: [materializing from shadows of entryway] Yes.

Me: I don't like it when you do that.

9: [smirk] He's in the garage.

Me: [tromping down the stairs and into the garage] Hey, babe. What... WHAT.

Boy: I'm helping. Only... I can't shut the fridge.

Me: Yeah. Um. Because you've got FOUR CASES OF WATER shoved in it.

Boy: Are you proud of me?

Me: You have no idea.

Boy: [beams]

Lord, have mercy. Please?

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